Seeking Imperfection

Roland said something I found sweet the other night, and I want to remember it. He told me that he found my voice comforting.

Earlier we'd been discussing how I enjoy reading out loud. I do a lot of that in my job working with medically fragile students. Often we have "medical days" where their bodies don't seem to be cooperating, but I never know if they are listening, so sometimes when I'm not sure what else to do, I read to them. Sometimes I worry that I don't do enough "active, hands-on" teaching with them. Sometimes I worry that reading to them all the time is too passive. But when I talked to one of the nurses the other day, she mentioned that it is meaningful to have someone who wants to sit and read with you - and after all, we all know the benefits of reading to our children.

I've wanted to read out loud to Roland for some time, but have never been sure that we could agree on a book. Then Friday night, he took me out to see Inkheart for my birthday. I'd wanted to see it because I'd loved the book. We'd talked again about my reading to him, and over the previews for Angels and Demons, I suggested maybe we could read books that were also movies, and then we could see the movie for a "date" after. So, we've now started our first book, The Da Vinci Code. I've read two chapters so far, one a night before bed. Lately I've found after a day of dealing with students and staff, and then a spirited preschooler, I'm often too tired to spend time with Roland, and I've worried about this. I'm hoping that reading and talking about a book will help us fit a little "us" time in.

I've told him that I've gotten compliments at work about my reading, and asked him if I really did read "that well" and he told me that I did. He told me that he enjoyed listening to me, and found my voice comforting. I found that to be so sweet, that the next night I told him how much that meant to me. I've been thinking about it over the past few days, hoping that maybe that's what it means to my students, too. Maybe when all the medical things get in the way, maybe the act of coming together and sharing a story is comforting.