An Overly Dramatic Post About Journaling  

Saturday, February 23, 2008

I realized recently that I don't think I know how to keep a journal.

This is funny if you were to know that I have kept an online journal in one way, shape or form for about eight years now. I started one on a wedding board, where the journal was about planning my wedding. I met several friends through that board, and when the board closed the journal section, we bounced around the web together, and have been chatting since.

The problem is that I know that I like to read other people's journals - and now their blogs - better than I like to write in my own. The reason is that I usually think that other people's lives are more interesting than mine. I often feel that when I am "journaling" I have to "entertain." I often will post in other people's journals but won't update mine, because I don't have an entertaining post. I suppose that isn't really the point of journaling.

Seeing as I am great at analyzing a subject to death, I did a little research this morning about "how to keep a journal." The articles I read suggested, mainly just writing or typing about whatever. It seems so simple and like a "Duh" kind of thing, so why is it so hard for me? Why do I think all of my posts have to be Pulitzer Prize winning material?

I spoke to Roland about this dilemma last night, and he said that a blog is meant to entertain. So then I got worried and figured I wasn't doing it "right," and that I wasn't being entertaining. I told him I was upset because I wasn't getting very many comments, so I must be doing something wrong. His response? "Why do you care?"

Why do I care? I don't know. It must be rooted to the need I've had my entire life to have people like me. I don't care who they are, or if I like them or not, but for some reason I want everyone I've ever met to like me. "Oh Michelle? She's so nice, isn't she? She's such a sweetheart..." etc, etc. I know that this possibly makes me sound quite vain, but it really is something that I've struggled with my whole life. I hold myself to impossibly high standards - standards I would never hold anyone else to, and then I get mad at myself when I can't reach them.

I am going to try and loosen up on myself, and blog just for myself. Although I do hope to make some bloggy friends and hope that you all enjoy what I write...I am going to try to learn to write for me as well. Wish me luck.

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3 comments: to “ An Overly Dramatic Post About Journaling

  • Crazy Daisy
    February 24, 2008 at 12:49 AM  

    It can be hard, but do blog for yourself first. I too have found it hard, as sometimes other people seem to have more entertaining lives than myself. However you have to do what works for you! It will take time to have massive amounts of readers. Take one day, one post at a time. Blog often, even if just a few sentences. You don't have to write a book, just an update :-) - - - -I have enjoyed reading your blog thus far! Keep up the good work!

  • Michie
    February 24, 2008 at 7:16 AM  

    Thank you for your nice comments. I really appreciate them. :)

  • Candace & Anna
    February 24, 2008 at 10:49 AM  

    I enjoy reading your blog too but I don't always have time to reply. Either I am reading in the few minutes I can spare or Anna just won't let me have my hands to type lol. Hang in there. Your blog will be something to treasure down the road. I love to be able to look back at what we were doing last year or whenever.


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