Seeking Imperfection

Dear Blog:

I didn't really mean to abandon you for over three months. Life just got in the way, and I got a little depressed toward the end of the summer.

We had a big "surprise" in our household - I am pregnant with baby #2! We did not plan to have another child, and that coupled with the fact that I am still out of work kind of put me into a depression. I got very worried that a) I have no job, so money is extra tight, b) that I don't know when or how I'm going to get a teaching job when I'm going to need to go out on maternity leave, and c) I had (and still do have) all kinds of worries about being able to love this baby as much as I love Paige, and being able to find time for both of them.

So here we are now in November. I'm 17 weeks pregnant and have an appointment in three weeks to find out the sex of the baby. Paige (and her parents, to be honest) are hoping for a girl. I asked Paige if she would love the baby even if it was a boy, and she said, "I'll think about it." :)

I am feeling a little better about the baby coming...Roland and I always said that we wouldn't try for another, but if one came, it was "meant to be," so I keep telling myself it's meant to be. I'm still freaking out about money and not having a job and having time and energy for all of this as I'm no spring chicken, but I'm still trying to learn to take this one day at a time.

And to end on a happy note, here's Miss Paige as Rapunzel:



I love this picture, but I couldn't totally crop that guy on tv out of it...I'm going to have to get Roland to edit it.

Happy Belated Halloween!